My Time in Sudan

I was severely disappointed that I was denied a visa into Sudan where I was planning on taking a bike trip from Khartoum to Egypt. I had come back to Addis Ababa early to apply for my visa as well as by a random chance (I missed a hitch hike ride which landed me on the couch of an amazing couple from Belgium which led to me helping with a conference for journalists in Ethiopia on children's rights in the media in Addis) –yes, I know my life might be the most random ever I was thinking as I was bullshitting my way through a speech in front of all these journalists.
But anyways, visa to Sudan denied, I was sitting on the plane on the way to Egypt with a layover in Khartoum disappointed to be so close but so far, questioning if I should have left Ethiopia to begin with, with this impending war with Eritrea, it could be newsworthy, but I lacked the contacts I needed for a story so after 2 near-misses, I decided to try to get off in Sudan anyways. This failed, but I did meet some interesting people along the way.
I got to talk to diplomats from all over and was envious of their fascinating lives. It is frustrating to see people in jobs I want so much and have no idea how to get there, to be in places full of stories and have no idea how to get them. I spoke for a few hours with a man who used to be in the French Special Services (comparable to the CIA in the U.S.). Now he is in Sudan to act as sort of an auditor about the money going into Sudan. It is interesting, there is public outcry about why we aren't doing anything to stop the atrocities in Darfur. The reality is, we are doing things, they just aren't working. According to this man, Al Bashir refuses to let people that aren't African into the country to help up until now. The runway of the airport is lined with shiny new helicopters donated by Canada and the U.S. that can't be used because of this reason. Millions of dollars are wasted. Also, there is the issue of the money we donate mysteriously disappearing. Lots of money and food comes into the country but it is never give to the people who need it. The auditor explained that we donate a lot, but we expect results in our European ways. But this is Africa. Much of the money goes to bakshish. Much of it disappears. It might not be that we aren't helping, but that we are not allowed to help. To set the record straight, I do want to state that this is not me advocating that we stop helping in every way that we possibly can, not at all, just that we should maybe look for additional ways to help and with a less European/U.S. view for a completely different continent like Africa.
The way things are done in Africa is completely different. I have encountered this with the NGOs I have helped with and the journalists I have met. From my cultural bias it frustrates me because it appears to be incompetence, poor time-management and lack of initiative. But I must remind myself that I am the outsider and have no right to judge or want to change things. I must constantly remember that this is Africa.
This is Africa where there is this wildness, where there is so much culture and family and beauty, but also so much darkness and violence. It takes days to accomplish what would take hours or less in the U.S. Money disappears, bakshish is always necessary. A small group of people have huge houses while other starve and live in the streets because for the powerful there is a big business in perpetuating conflict. There are people here who have never known what it is like not to live in fear.
I feel Africa is explosive. Things may move at a snail's pace, but they can also change drastically from one day to the next. One diplomat I met was in Sierra Leone a few years ago. They met with a faction of the government and shared a lobster lunch with them, relations were good. Overnight, things changed, they came back and shot the diplomat's friend.
The auditor was telling me of missions diving through rivers to evacuate French citizens on the Ivory Coast when things turned sour unexpectedly. He told me that in 1991, I believe, he was in charge of guarding the French ambassador to the CAF. Rebels came in suddenly and were shaking the walls of the embassy to get in. He fired about 200 bullets each warding them off that night keeping only enough bullets, at the request of the French ambassador to use to kill him, his wife and their 2 daughters in case the rebels got in because he didn't want to spend the last hours of their lives at the hands of these rebels. The auditor kept a bullet for himself as well. After a long night they succeeded in keeping the rebels out.
But things like that happen in Africa. It is so unpredictable. I am learning to try and keep my wits about me. There is a great sense of adventure about it. There is a very different Africa as well, a well-touristed Africa where many people do go. But as for me, where is the fun in that?
A bit about Khartoum- the runway is full of military equipment including rocket launchers that look ready to be fired up at the plane as it lands, not the most welcoming sight! When we landed the pilot received cheers and applause from people in the cabin. One passenger yelled, "Welcome to Khartoum, the greatest city on earth!"
The city is more modern than I expected. It's huge with large buildings and orderly paved streets. One strange thing is that all the neighborhoods are walled in as blocks.
In the rural areas whole towns are walled in. There are nice roads, but the yare almost completely empty. It's dry and brown without much green. I got to see the northern desert where camels cross into Egypt and lakes of blue water float on the brown sand. The desert fades from white rocks to reddish dunes. Sand dunes harden into rock. It is beautiful and barren with the lonely feeling conjured only by deserts.
That's all I can say sadly for now. Hopefully I will be able to return and see more later as a journalist with backing for a story or as a diplomat of sorts. I can dream. Starting a career is proving difficult and if anyone has any suggestions as to how to get there, please do let me know!